The birth of my first great grandchild reminded me of how scary newborn infants can be. I’d forgotten how fragile they actually were when each of my four were born. How can something be so soft, cuddly, and delicate and at the same time, be so scary?
Because of an infant’s fragility, they are totally dependent on their parents. They feel like a rag doll when you pick them up and you have to support their head and the rest of their body for fear of breaking something. The only things they know how to do is. . .drink milk, pooh, cry, and sleep. . .(until 3:00AM anyway). However, they eventually learn to sit-up, stand, talk, walk, run, and get into things.
Then something happens. They develop intelligence and minds of their own. With it come opinions, decisions, strange ideas, and rebellion. Then comes the influence of peer pressure, girlfriends, boyfriends, rings in the nose, tattoos, and more rebellion, but hey, we still love them because they are our kids, right?
This little person that was once totally dependent on me is now leaving home, and striking out on his or her own. They know everything and forgotten all about me. They don’t visit as often as I’d like them to and they are learning different things than what I taught them and things I just as soon they didn’t learn.
All of a sudden the house is empty and quiet. . .very quiet. Hello-o-o, hello-o-o, hello-o. Anybody here, here, here, here.
The peace is great for about a week then I realize that their dependence on me affected me in another way. . .I needed them as much as they needed me. After all, I was dad, friend, nurturer, provider, teacher, counselor, protector, maid, chef, nanny, and personal guidance coordinator.
I supplied their food, clothes, roof, toys, medical attention, and even consoled them when they were down and gave them atta-boys when they did things good and right. I supported them at school plays, games, teachers meetings, PTA, and now. . .they were gone.
The many different hats that I wore were lost that day. They did not depend on me anymore but that’s the nature of the beast. Since the day they were born, their independence is what I groomed them for – daily, while periodically steering them in the right direction with an occasional correction across the knee. I hoped that things would stick when they ventured out into the world on their own.
I taught them my beliefs and values, and about God, and wanted them to learn from their own mistakes and gave them the latitude to do so with free will in hopes that they would derive a better than average chance of survival in the world. I would not always be there with them or to save them, at least until I was unable to do so.
I got excited about their independence, especially when they’d make the right decisions and then grew from them. However, many times I cringed when they went down a wrong path and I’d say, “Hey! I surely didn’t teach them that. UGH. Underline the word ‘surely.’” I must admit though that I miss the good ole days when they just depended on me. It’s purely selfish and clingy, I know, but. . .
As Christians, I wonder if the Father thinks about His children the same way we think about ours, as being fragile, soft, delicate, and drinkers of milk. We haven’t learned how to stand, walk, or talk the spiritual things of God yet and as infants we are totally dependent on Him [John 15:5].
v13 For every one that useth milk is unskilful in the word of righteousness: for he is a babe.
v14 But strong meat belongeth to them that are of full age, even those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil [Hebrews 5:13-14].
To help us in our decision making process and giving us the chance of survival, God the Father also gave us the latitude of free will. As we grow, our worship and prayer time builds each day and we find ourselves more dependent on Him. He supplies all of our needs.
Then something happens. We develop intelligence and minds of our own. We venture out on our own with our own ministry, doctrines, opinions, decisions, beliefs, and like Martha, we get so caught up in those things of God that in the process we forget about our Abba Father. We have developed our independence through free will and have grown up in the Lord.
We don’t visit Him as often as He’d probably like but we’re learning, working in our ministry, and doing the work of God. We do our best at working at what God’s Word taught us but we neglect the visitations that He craves from His children just like we crave the visitations from our children while they are out providing for their kids and doing (hopefully) what we taught them. However, God still loves us because we are His children. He will never leave or forsake us (Heb 13:5).
As a parent, I taught my kids how to take care of themselves so they could, one day, grow up, and have their independence and live on meat. However, I miss the personal validation of that dependence. I wonder if God feels the same way and doesn’t like giving His children their independence either because He just misses the good ole days, like I do. . .when they just depended on Him.
Return to Christ and visit Him daily in His Word and through prayer. Set the rudder of your ship with the Word of God and through fellowship with Him. In Jesus name.
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Next week (unless the Lord intervenes): Return to Me. As I watch the events of today manifest before my eyes and check it against the Word of God I am convinced that Christ is soon coming. The Lord has been building something in me for quite a while now and I feel that He is about to birth that word in me. The Good Ole Days blog is a perfect lead in to what God has been feeding my spirit and unless I have misread the timing, I will proceed, with the Lord’s leading, to next week’s blog, Return to me.
God bless you all and we’ll see you next time.
Thanks for stopping by and for supporting me and my writing,
Your Host: James Lindquist
Christian Author and Ebook creator: http://www.jameslindquistbooks.com
Here is another good analogy saying the same thing in different words.
“At birth we board a train and meet our parents. We believe they will always travel by our side. However, at some station, our parents will step down from the train, leaving us on this journey alone. As time goes by, other people will board the train and they will be significant – siblings, friends, the love of your life, children, and many others. Some will step down and leave a permanent vacuum. Others will go so unnoticed that we won’t realize they vacated their seats. The train ride will be full of joy, sorrow, fantasy, expectations, hellos, good-byes, and farewells. A successful ride requires having a good relationship with all passengers. We must give the best of ourselves.
The mystery to everyone is, we do not know at which station we ourselves will step down. So, we must live in the best way, love, forgive, and offer the best of who we are. It is important to do this because when the time comes for us to step down and leave our seat empty, we should leave behind beautiful memories for those who will continue to travel on the train of life. I wish you a joyful journey on the train of life. Reap success and give lots of love. More importantly, thank God for the journey.
Lastly, I thank you for being one of the passengers on my train.”
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This was excellent Jim. Very touching and I could relate to much of what you said. Yes I believe God craves our time with Him. He earnestly looks to see if we are coming to see Him. I can see Him listening for our call. Makes us realize as you said, yes, we are happy our kids are learning to stand on their own, just as God is happy to see we are making good decisions and following what He taught us. Yet like God, we still miss the fact that at times our kids don’t seem to need us like they did, and that we now like God are longing for fellowship and time with our kids.
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